Kids and God (sort of)

So I was babysitting some of my favorite kids in the world on Saturday afternoon while their parents were at a funeral. We were playing outside when the little girl asks if her boyfriend can come over. I was a little confused because this girl is four, but she explained to me that she has two boyfriends because she likes them better than all the other boys and they hold hands. She has a neighbor, who is not her favorite boyfriend, but he is her neighbor and they're both four, so they date too. This kid's playing outside to, so I say he can come over and we're all playing and then this kid asks where their parents are
The six year old boy says they're at a funeral but this kid doesn't know what that is, so he explains: "A lady was old and sick and then she died."
"So they went to help her?" the younger boy asks
"No, she already died."
"So what are they doing there?" (Which, if you think about it is a very fair question, especially if said questioner is four.)
"Um, she's in heaven."
"So what are you parents doing?"
"Do you know who Jesus is?"
So that made me laugh a lot, because it's such a modern Christian answer. Here's this kid, seeking to understand something about his world and here's a leader of sorts who doesn't have the answers, so he tries to distract by making him wonder about his faith in Jesus when all this kid really wants to know is why some random chick is hanging out at his girlfriend's house just because some lady is already dead! I mean, at first I just thought it was a really funny story, but I was telling it to some of my Christian friends, and all they liked about it was that the kid was evangelizing... And I'm not criticizing this kid or his parents or his church (which is also my church), I just feel like it's funny and the sort of thing that could be used as a fantastic metaphor by a marginally talented Museist writer.

In which Diana makes a confession for May Day

I'm really bad at finishing books. I love to read, but I have a lot of books and a short attention span. And when I see a book at a garage sale or used book store or library sale or on Amazon, I just have to buy it. Also, people know I love to read and give me books as gifts. Also also, I borrow a lot of books from people like Anna and my dad, who aren't particularly concerned with getting said books back at any specific time (although I promise that I know all of those books are not gifts and I will return them!)

I also really like In Your Pants jokes as invented by John Green and Maureen Johnson and made amazing by John and Hank Green. In Your Pants jokes are easy to make and never ever get old. All you have to do is add in your pants to the end of the book title. Hilarity nearly always ensues.

So bearing these two confesions in mind, I have decided to make a list. This is a list of books I must complete before going to college (in exactly 3 months and 30 days) or at the very least, until I buy more books, in order of how funny they are when "In Your Pants" is added to the title. I promise, "in your pants" is the only way to find reading a book list enjoyable.

Books I must read/finish before going to Gonzaga (or at least before buying any more!)
F= to finish
R= to start
[F] No bars to Manhood
[R] Civil disobedience
[R] A brief History of everything
[F]Epicenter
[F] The Audacity of hope
[F] The Midwives
[R] Illegal Motion
[R] The Jungle
[F] I know why the caged bird sings
[R] The Hornet’s nest
[R] When the pieces don’t fit
[F] Catch 22
[R] Melochek the Devil
[F] A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s court
[R] Aspects of public health nursing (although since this is a textbook and it looks horrible, that probably won’t happen)
[R] Cat’s Cradle
[F] Christ the Lord out of Egypt
[F]Dreams from my father
[R] Walden
[F] We wish to inform you that tomorrow we will be killed with our families